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Okay, so you're not famous for being the type of person who conjures up Hallmark sentiments every time your mouth opens. You have other redeeming qualities -- among them, the ability to call a spade a spade. At the moment, however, you'll be amazed at just how poetically you'll describe that same spade. If you embarrass easily and you can't stand the thought of someone remembering you in this verbal condition, better swear off conversation entirely for at least the couple of days.

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